Unbecoming of an (old) lady.Posted: August 27, 2011
While the east coast is preparing for the hurricane of the century, the west is sweltering.
Well, LA is.
I’m wearing a vest top and shorts, I’m working inside and I have no a/c.
In desperation, I just poured an ice cold bottle of water down my chest.
Twenty years ago that would have been as sexy as all hell.
But it occurred to me, as I watched the rivulets of water congregate in my 43-year-old cleavage, that it’s probably just as well I did it in the privacy of my own home.
Pouring water down your chest, like other things that were once sexy (hot pants, glitter eye-shadow and knee-high socks), are now merely the opening montage to a hilarious new sit-com about a sassy older lady who thinks she’s still got it!
As Dorothy Parker once said, ‘Life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporania. And love is a thing that can never go wrong. And I am Marie of Romania.’
I think that makes my point.
Frankly, I’m too hot to focus.
Also, I now have a damp carpet.
(That’s not a euphemism).