Spinny does stand-up?Posted: April 10, 2011
I’m not made of rubber, although there have been times when I thought I might have been. Not any more. When I was younger, I bounced back a lot easier from bad news, heartache and the daily crap that life throws at you.
I’m a pretty positive person but right now I’m being severely tested.
I split up with my boyfriend of almost two years in early December, and it’s finally hitting me hard. Another relationship – that I genuinely thought was going somewhere – lasted 18 months before that.
In the last ten years, I can “proudly” boast three failed long-term relationships. From 32 to 42, that’s how it played out.
My heart is heavy, and I’m not sure how to cope. The older we get, the less elastic we are…in every way. Our skin sags, and sometimes, so does our soul.
So I’m doing all the usual things. I’m writing, burying my head in work – and I’m also thinking about doing stand-up again. After my relationship ended in my early-thirties, I fulfilled a life-long dream to do stand-up. I was rock bottom, so I figured I had nothing to lose.
Doing stand-up took me on an amazing journey. Looking back, I’m so pleased I found the guts to get up there and make people laugh. It was tough, and I wasn’t the best, but I gave it my all.
On my good nights, I was really good, and I even performed at the Edinburgh Festival. It was the confidence I found on-stage that gave me the impetus I needed to come to America to fulfill my script-writing dreams.
Now that I’m here – and have suffered a bucket-load of disappointment (and am constantly beating myself up about my perceived failures) – maybe it’s time that Spinny took to the stage again?
One more bounce. What do you think?